Friday 25 February 2011

We'll All Be Rooned

What kind of a nation are we turning into? It appears that our youth, as well as newcomers to our shores, are no longer tough enough to deal with full-strength vegemite:


I don't mind admitting that our national foodstuff is pretty disgusting, but that is what has made us the proud nation that we are. Learning to pretend to love something that tastes just a tiny bit like poison has forged each and every one of us in a salty fire. And, if we are to retain any sense of dignity, we need to take drastic measures now. In my view, applicants for citizenship should be turned down immediately, unless they can eat five rounds of hot-buttered Tip Top smeared with full-strength Vegemite without gagging. Hard times call for stern measures: the 'Australian identity' is under threat.

4 comments:

  1. Wot?? Brits have been clinging to the one remaining shred of manhood left them since Paul Hogan convinced the world that Austraians are the only real blokes around. That shred is: our Marmite is even more foul, more salty and more butch than your wimpy Vege so-called Mite. But now you don't don't even want even to play the game any more like it doesn't matter? Cah!

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  2. Have you ever tasted Vegemite? Marmite is strawberry jam compared to the mighty V.

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  3. Yes, I have, and it was rubbish.

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  4. ...I had to drink only half a tin of Lyle's Golden Syrup to take the taste away...

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